One of the things that makes the concept of death of a loved one so painful among other things is the lack of knowledge we have of where and in what state our loved one is.
We are often parted from our loved ones in the world by physical distances when they go off on long journeys or fly off to settle in another country. And, although painful, this kind of parting is considered a temporary parting. We have hope that we will meet again. We are reassured knowing that they have reached their destination and that they are in a comfortable place, that they are enjoying their time and achieving their goals.
For parents, the natural parental instinct of protecting one’s baby and providing them with comfort makes parting with a baby all the more difficult. Ask any parent who has had to part with their newborn who may be in NICU or special care, and you will see the anguish they are going through. It is unnatural for a mother to be separated from her baby and the pain is unbearable, and the anxiety and emptiness acute. Now imagine the state of a mother who is parted from her baby with no hope to see them again. Except, thanks to our faith, there is hope. There is hope that a mother will be reunited with her baby, there is hope that we will see the loved ones we lost again.
In the case of babies who have left this world, there is a consensus among the scholars that they go directly to Jannah. The ahadith mention how those children are in Paradise and are under the care of Prophet Ibrahim (a.s.). Now imagine your child playing in that beautiful place free from all problems, pains and evils. Imagine him or her in the care of Prophet Ibrahim (a.s.) whom Allah describes as Khalilulah (the friend of Allah). Doesn’t that give peace to the heart? And then the hope of meeting them there one day.
Samurah ibn Jundub (رضى اللهُ عنه) narrated: The Messenger of Allah (ﷺ) often used to say to his companions: “Has anyone among you seen a dream?” and whoever Allah willed would tell him what he had seen. One day he said: “Last night two people came to me and made me get up, and they said to me: ‘Let’s go.’ So I set off with them…”
He mentioned things that he had seen, then he said: “We set off, and we came to a verdant garden, in which were all the colours of spring, where there was a man who was so tall that I could hardly see his head in the sky. Around the man was the largest number of children I had ever seen…”
Then among things that the two angels explained to him was: “As for the tall man who was in the garden, that was Ibrahim (عَلَيْهِ السَّلَام). As for the children who were around him, these are all the children who died in a state of fitrah.” One of the Muslims said: “O Messenger of Allah (ﷺ), what about the children of the mushrikeen?” He said: “And the children of the mushrikeen.” (Bukhari)
The hope that our deen gives us is what gives us the strength to move forward with a productive attitude. We are reminded of the good life we have to strive for to meet our loved ones in Jannah.
May Allah make the children we have lost forerunners, stored treasures and answered intercessors for us. And may we all be reunited with them in Jannatul Firdous.
May Allah give us a trust (tawakkal) in Him and His promise that makes all the trials of the world easy for us. May He reunite us with our children in the sweetest of reunions and the best of places. And may He give us the patience, the steadfastness and the good life that would allow us to live with them in Bait-ul-Hamd in the highest levels of Jannah for eternity. Ameen.